Sanity + Humanity

Hello darlings,

Before we start I have two very important things to tell you. 

1. Beyonce is dropping a country album on 3/29. This will be the good-est of Good Fridays. So put on your Stetson and pull up your boots. I’ll see you at the rodeo.  

2. I am THRILLED to say that I’ve been accepted to start training for my Certified Financial Therapist license. That’s right y’all. This girl is on her way to becoming a MENTAL HEALTH PROFESH. I’m already dusting off my leather settee for you to sit in. 

Today I want to talk about how we need to be helping people. For our own health. Before I dive deeper into this, I want to acknowledge something. 

We have evolved to effectively deal with the issues of a relatively small tribe of people. We are made to keep ourselves and the tribe healthy and whole and thriving. Because the truth is, our survival depends on one another. It did hundreds of thousands of years ago and it does now. 

We were not made to ingest and process the level of systemic violence, injustice, and inequity we have access to today. Go down just one level into almost any news headline and you come face to face with the tragic flaws of our species. What used to be segmented on the 6 o'clock news is now on 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It is inescapable. No wonder I often find myself adrift in a sea of existential fear and dread. Fellow feelers, hear me out, this is not a weakness in us. We are SUPPOSED to feel like we do when we see what we are seeing. 

HOWEVER, this is our time to be here on this earth. We cannot change that. But it does mean that in order to retain our sanity and our humanity, we must pick a lane of engagement. We must do, not just think or feel.

I truly believe that if you and I are not in alignment with that drive to help others in some way, we will pay the cost one way or another. This might sound woo-woo but I think energy is not meant to build within us but to flow out. If you completely block up a stream in the forest, you will definitely get more water. But if there’s no outlet, it will grow stagnant and fester. I think sometimes the overwhelming needs around us cause us to shut down and grow stagnant. But it doesn’t have to be that way. 

We all intrinsically know that aligning ourselves with our values is done through action. But I’ll be honest, as soon as I am inspired to do something like protest, donate money, or volunteer I hear two voices. One says “this will do nothing” and the other says “this will leave me with less than what I need.” These are demonstrably false. If you give one dollar to a person experiencing homelessness, you will not solve homelessness. But that’s not the same as “doing nothing.” As for the second one, all I can say is trust yourself. Trust that you know how to properly take care of yourself. If giving is new to you, start small but stay consistent. Sign up for ongoing payments of $20/mo to three causes you care about. 

I promise you’ll feel better afterward. For more on how action helps our bodies complete their stress cycles brought on by things like work or watching current events, check out this book. Total game-changer. https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/592377/burnout-by-emily-nagoski-phd-and-amelia-nagoski-dma/ 

Mr. Rogers said “look for the helpers” and I say… that’s not enough. BE a helper. That way you don’t have to look too far. 

See you next month.